


And All These Things Shall Be Added Unto You

by Donovanspen



Series: Walk Through the Valley [10]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Common Cold, Cuddling & Snuggling, Developing Relationship, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-06-07
Updated: 2013-06-07
Packaged: 2017-12-14 05:58:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,941
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/833546
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Donovanspen/pseuds/Donovanspen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It took them a long time to get here. </p>
<p>(Final story in the verse)</p>
            </blockquote>





	And All These Things Shall Be Added Unto You

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading!

Dean rolled over, reaching blindly for his buzzing cell phone. ‘Damn,’ he thought, groggily, squinting at the illuminated display. “Yeah?”

“Nice to know you’re still alive.”

Dean groaned and flopped back down against his pillow. It was way too early for a morning lecture from his brother. The sun wasn’t even peeking through the curtains yet.

“What the hell, Dean? You missed your last check-in.”

Years of practice had him hearing the brotherly concern buried underneath layers of annoyance and indignation. “Sorry. Late night,” he muttered, giving up all hope of slipping back into unconsciousness. Just a few words from his brother and he had lost the haze he’d worked so hard to create last night. Cheap perfume still lingered in the air, and the morning-after, Jack Daniels-induced-cotton-mouth complimented his headache beautifully. The only good thing about this morning was that he’d sent Mindy, no Mandy, packing before he did something he really regretted.

“So, that’s what you’re doing out there?” Sam’s voice came through low and full of disappointment.

“What? No. Dammit Sam, I’m not even awake yet, but no, I’m not out here just screwing around. But I’d have every right to if I was.”

“You need to come in, Dean. It’s been two months.”

“I am,” he hedged. “I was just gonna swing up and see Bobby real quick.”

“And hang out there until the next hunt,” Sam guessed. “Bobby’s not home. He’s on a job up in Maine. Old friend of his needed help.”

Dean didn’t answer, not wanting to make empty promises but also not wanting Sam to think he was grasping for excuses. The truth was, and Sam knew it, that he wasn’t ready to settle down. After Cas lost the last bit of his grace, they had all stayed at Bert’s farm for another two months with Sam and Dean taking the occasional hunt while Cas recuperated. Bert and Bobby had approached them with the idea of getting their own place. They had the resources to get them started, and it would allow Bert to continue to help behind the scenes.

Cas agreed to do it, a little quickly if you asked Dean. And he was pretty sure that Sam agreed because he didn’t want to leave Cas alone. But the fact that Cas didn’t even talk it over with them spoke volumes. And yeah, Dean had pictured Cas on the road hunting with him and Sam, but he could have seen himself taking a breather, even if he wasn’t quite ready to settle down and live life off the road.

“Look, you don’t have to stay, but I need you and Cas to work out your issues. Every time you take a new job, Cas pushes himself even harder, as if he has something to prove. This last job….”

“Last job?” Dean cut him off, sitting up, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. “You guys hunting?”

It was quiet for a few seconds before Sam answered. “Did you think we weren’t?”

“Obviously,” he snapped. “What the hell is the point of the cabin and crap?”

“To have another place like Bobby’s where we can rest up and recuperate. Did you really think we were just strictly research?”

“When I left Bert’s, Cas was in no shape to be hunting. What the hell were you thinking, going out with him?”

“He’s going, regardless, Dean. At least I have his back.”

Dean heard the unspoken accusation. “Yeah, well, I don’t think he really wants me there.”

“You’re wrong. We both want you here. I’m saying it outright because that’s what an emotionally mature person does. And I’m telling you for Cas because he’s still feeling his way through all this, but I’d have to be a blind idiot not to see how he feels. I’m not promising anything, but it has to be better than this.”

“Yeah, ok,” he muttered. And really, what else could he do? He didn’t want either of them out there risking their lives. He was fine hunting on his own, but he wanted to be there to watch their backs. “I’ll be there later this afternoon.”     

 

 

It was well after 10pm before Dean finally found the obscure little cabin. He’d been driving around these back mountain roads for the past two hours, cursing a blue streak at every wrong turn. If he could have found his way back to town, he surely would have gotten a room for the night and tried again in the morning. 

The only way he even knew this was the right place was the metal carport housing the late model Ford Explorer that Bobby had given Sam. He backed the Impala into the open space and cut the engine. The lights were on in the cabin, but nobody had come out yet. He sat there for a moment, wondering what was waiting for him. He’d felt a little relief knowing that this whole cabin thing hadn’t meant retiring, but he still wasn’t convinced that Cas could hold his own on a hunt.

His phone buzzed. He glanced down, smirking as he read the text. ‘I’m not coming out there to carry your bags in’.

It was late, and he was tired. Best to move this on and get it over with, just like ripping off a band-aid. Sam met him at the door, effectively killing any chance of awkwardness by pulling him into a big bear hug. And man, did it feel good.

“Jerk,” Sam muttered, pulling away. “I should be so pissed at you.”

“Yeah, but you’ll get over it.” He looked around the room, seeing what Sam and Cas had claimed as their living space. It reminded him of many of the motels that they had stayed in. 

“It’s not much to look at, but it’s very comfortable,” Sam offered.

“Did you …uh… decorate it?” Dean asked walking over and flopping down onto the sofa, which was way more comfortable than it appeared. The furniture had definitely seen better days, but it was sturdy and functional. Mismatched area rugs were spread over the wooden floor and various throws and blankets were strewn over the chairs and sofa. And of course, two large bookshelves were against the far wall with books crammed into every open space as well as stacked on the floor nearby.

“It used to be a hunting cabin.” Sam handed him a beer and then took a seat at the other end of the sofa. “Two small bedrooms at the back, one of them a back porch that was converted. Cas claimed that room because of all the light that comes in.”

Dean nodded, taking a long draw of his beer. “We’ve definitely seen worse.”

“True. This place needs some work, but it’s sturdy, and the location is good.”

“No kidding. How the hell did Bobby even find this place?”

“Dunno,” Sam shrugged. “He and Bert said they found an out-of-the-way place that would be good for setting up shop.”

Dean should have known that Bobby wouldn’t have stuck them in a two-bedroom bungalow with a picket fence. A rustic cabin with used furniture in the middle of nowhere was definitely more the old hunter’s style.

“So, where’s Cas?” he asked, not sure he managed to sound as casual as he’d wanted. He wasn’t expecting Cas to meet him at the door with a giant hug, but he had hoped to see his friend tonight, despite his apprehension.

“Sleeping. This last hunt really sucked, and it completely wiped him out.”

“Is he ok?”

“Sick. He was out searching for a grave in the freezing rain for most of the night. This spirit was really pissed. He’d been killed by a drunk driver and was causing accidents on this one stretch of road. Took me forever to convince the sheriff to close off that area.”

Dean felt a small sense of relief flow through him once he realized that Cas hadn’t been injured, but he was still uneasy about him getting sick, and why Sam had let him go out there alone.

“He was out there pretty much all night, Dean, and one of us had to deal with the police. As far as hunts go, this could have been so much worse.”

“I didn’t say anything.”

“Please,” Sam huffed. “I know what you’re like. And Cas isn’t going to like it if he thinks you only came back to take care of him.”

“Yeah, I got it. Don’t baby, Cas.”

“I remember that feeling, Dean, trying to walk that line between needing someone and trying to prove yourself. I mean, the feelings aren’t exactly the same, but….”

“Sam, I get it. I was ready to come in, all right? I just needed some space, and I think Cas did too.”

“You’re probably right,” Sam muffled through a yawn. “I haven’t had much sleep this past week so I’m going to crash. The bedrooms are pretty rough. We haven’t had time to buy beds. I’m on a full size air mattress in one room, and Cas is on a regular mattress in the other room. The sofa is the most comfortable of all, but I’m in the larger room if you want to crash in there.”

Sharing with his little brother or with the man he wasn’t sure even wanted to see him. “I’ll take the sofa for now.” He was already feeling the pull from the beer and the warmth of the woodstove. He gave Sam a nod and watched him disappear behind one of the doors on the other side of the room. He kicked off his shoes and lay back, pulling one of the blankets down over him. He drifted off thinking about how comfortable he felt and wondering if it was the cabin or the fact that he was back with his family.

 

 

 Dean awoke the next morning to the sound of Sam moving around the small room.

“Sorry,” he apologized when he noticed that Dean was awake. “Even with the heat, this place doesn’t really stay warm without a fire.”

Dean could feel the cold in the air as he burrowed back under the covers. He glanced at his watch, surprised to see that it was well after 9am. After a few more moments of enjoying the warmth of his cocoon of blankets, he ventured out and joined Sam over in the kitchen.

Sam handed him a cup of coffee as he continued to bustle around the small space. A minute later, he joined Dean at the table with a box of doughnuts and some fruit.

“Doughnuts?” Dean quirked an eyebrow and reached for the box.

“Cas has a sweet tooth.”

“Angels and sugar,” he commented before taking his first bite. “So, what do we do today?”

“I have to go into town for groceries, swing by the Laundromat, and pick up some stuff to winterize this place. There’s supposed to be a front moving through, and I want to make sure we’re well stocked in case the weather turns rough. You wanna come along?”

“What about Cas?”

“Too sick,” Sam replied

“Just how sick is he?”

“Really nasty chest cold. Took him to a clinic two days ago, and they prescribed some strong meds and that’s what knocked him out last night. He doesn’t sleep well so he’ll probably start getting better now that he’s getting some rest.”

“Don’t count on it,” a raspy voice grumbled.

Dean glanced up as Cas shuffled into the room. He looked terrible. His hair was longer and wildly sticking out in various directions. The dark stubble on his face stood out against his pale skin and red nose, but he did look as if he’d put on some weight since the last time Dean had seen him so that was something.

“Man, you look rough.” The words slipped out before he had a thought to censor himself. He’d spent the better part of last year looking after Cas, and it was not going to be easy to just shut that down.

“Hello, Dean.” Cas ambled past them and went about fixing himself a cup of coffee before joining them at the table.

“The medicine worked, though. I didn’t hear you coughing last night,” Sam said.

“It worked, but I do not like the sensation of being drugged. I’d rather not take anything.”

“You won’t get better unless you rest,” Sam argued.

Cas merely shot him a look and grabbed a doughnut from the box and turned his attention to Dean. “How were your hunts?”

“Pretty routine,” Dean shrugged, suddenly unsure of how to respond. “Lonely,” he added, deciding on an honest approach.

Cas simply nodded before launching into a coughing fit that had him scrambling from the table and heading to the bathroom. Dean got up to follow him, but Sam shook his head.

“He’s worse than Bobby when he’s sick. Just give him some space.”

“Are you sure he’s ok to leave here alone?” Dean asked, glancing back towards the bathroom door.

“They say it’s not the flu. He’s more likely to take it easy if we’re not around. I think he’s worried that we’ll think he’s weak if he takes it slow.”

It figured Cas would latch onto some crazy notion like that. Yeah, he’d said things to him a long time ago, teased him and such, but he’d said and done so much more since then to show how much they appreciated him. He wasn’t sure exactly how he was going to do it now, but he needed to convey to Cas that it wasn’t about being useful.

“Ok, level with me. What’s going on with him?” He waited while Sam looked towards the bathroom door, indecision all over his face. “Oh for the love…fine. Don’t tell me all the deep, dark secrets, but I need to know what’s going on with him physically.”

Sam sighed but agreed. “Physically, he’s really not that bad. His strength is building over time. He’s resourceful, and he can hunt smart, when he’s not trying to prove himself. I think he’s still insecure, but the more I rely on him and show him that I think he’s capable, the less he tries to prove himself. He still needs to take extra time, and I think he would as long as we don’t baby him. Dean,” he hesitated. “Cas thinks you stayed away because you felt as if he was weighing you down.”

“That’s not….”

“I know.”

“How the hell did we lose so much ground?” he wondered aloud.

“All of us have gone through some pretty major stuff. We’ve gotten so used to it because it’s our life. Cas used to roll with the punches just as easily, but to lose his grace and become human, I think it’s going to take a little bit more. He’s still Cas, same brusque personality, same big heart, same badass fighter. He just has to come to terms with being that way as a human.”

“All right, I hear ya.” And honestly, Dean hadn’t expected it to be easy. “So let’s give him some space and got get this stuff done.”

   

 

 

The supply run into town wasn’t that much different than the ones they did when visiting Bobby. The town was like so many others they had visited. Their first stop was to get items to winterize the cabin. It seemed many people had the same idea as Sam and were in town to stock up before the front moved through. With the remote location of the cabin, they thought it prudent to pick up some camping equipment, just in case, as well as plastic sheeting and weather stripping. 

The next several stops consisted of thrift stores where they grabbed a few more blankets as well as clothes. Since the cabin was essentially theirs, Sam reasoned that they had the room for the extra items so better to be prepared.

They split up for the grocery and laundry with Dean offering to do the wash as Sam had a pretty detailed list of items that he wanted. All in all, he was ok with this. Even though he knew he was heading back to the cabin instead of the open road or another hunt, he didn’t feel as troubled as he had been.

They arrived home early afternoon, just in time to see Cas out chopping wood. Dean was ready to explode until a not-so-subtle glare from Sam had him biting his tongue. It was 28 degrees outside, and Cas already sounded like shit, but hey, what did he know.

Sam convinced Cas to come inside for soup that they had picked up from a sandwich shop, and Dean had stalked outside to finish building up the wood supply. He stayed busy all afternoon working around the cabin, steering clear of Cas who was supposedly looking up some information for Bobby. It was one thing to give someone space. It was something else to ignore and enable bad choices. Dean felt that they were walking a fine line and told Sam as much.

“Dean, you’re just as bad when you’re sick,” Sam had finally snapped after two hours of Dean’s attitude.

   

 

The winds picked up and the icy rain began to pelt the small cabin around 9pm. Dean was in his spot on the sofa, barely paying attention to the movie he was supposed to be watching. Sam was in his room with an electric blanket and a book that he’d picked up from the used bookstore that he’d spotted on his way out of town.

Cas had crashed just before dinner, and neither brother was going to wake him when he was finally getting some rest. However, Dean was pretty sure he was awake now, as he’d been coughing pretty steadily for the past twenty minutes. He stubbornly stayed in that small, little room, though. Dean thought back to the first time Cas got sick, about a year ago when he first started losing his grace. That was when they had grown closer, when Cas had really began to open up and let Dean help him. Somewhere along the way, they had lost that connection.

After the next round of coughing fits, Dean pushed up from the sofa and went and knocked on the door. “Hey Cas, it’s me.” He could barely make out the raspy reply but assumed that Cas was inviting him in. He walked into the room and immediately felt as if he had stepped into a walk-in freezer. “The hell?” The door to the room had been opened all day, and the heat from the main cabin had kept it mildly warm. But now, with Cas shut up in here, the small, makeshift room was downright frigid. They had put weather stripping around the windows and had replaced the thin curtains with heavy blankets, but their meager efforts were no match for the dropping temperature and howling winds.

He dropped down onto the mattress, next to the bundled heap of blankets where only tufts of Cas’ hair were sticking out. “Hey, come on out here with me.”

The muffled grumbling sounded like ‘no’ but Dean had been expecting that. “I’m not going away so you might as well stop sulking. Besides, I’m sure I can find something that will make you feel better.”

“Not taking that stuff,” Cas wheezed out, dropping the blanket just enough to glare at Dean through watery, red eyes.

“Not gonna try to give it to you,” he promised. When Cas made a move to sit up, Dean left the room, trusting that Cas would come out on his own. He wasn’t disappointed. He watched from the small kitchen as Cas shuffled over to the sofa, still wrapped in one of his blankets. He joined him a few minutes later and handed him a steaming mug of tea.

Cas eyed it carefully before taking a small sip and then humming slightly. “This is good,” he rasped.

Dean grimaced at the how terrible he sounded. “That should help,” he offered, taking a seat next to him but making sure to leave some space. He wanted to reach out but knew that Cas wouldn’t appreciate his efforts. So he settled down to wait, biding his time.

“Better?” he asked when Cas drained the last of his spiked toddy.

“Much.”

And as Dean had hoped, the coughing had subsided a bit and Cas seemed much more at ease. It wasn’t like Cas couldn’t taste the alcohol, and Dean wasn’t trying to intentionally get him drunk, but he would take whatever softening the rum caused. He reached over and took the empty cup and placed it on the small coffee table.

Another minute passed with neither of them saying anything. He wished he could say it was a comfortable silence, but it wasn’t and he could feel the tension building with each passing second.

“Cas, I’m sorry,” he blurted out.

Cas tensed up and kept his eyes trained on the television. “For what?”

Dean sighed. Apparently, it hadn’t been enough rum to prevent Cas from going on the defensive. “For bailing like I did, and leaving you and Sam to try to figure out what’s going on with me. It wasn’t fair.”

Cas seemed to accept that answer as he nodded slightly, but he still refused to look over at Dean. The silence settled around them again. Dean knew that they weren’t finished, but he didn’t want to force it. Cas was still sitting there so he would take it slow. He didn’t have to wait long.

“Why did you leave, Dean?”

Deep down, he’d known that question was coming, and he had gone over a multitude of different answers that he could give, but none of them had been the most truthful.

“Because I was afraid that I was asking for more than you could give.”

Cas finally turned to look at him. “You could have asked me.”

And sorry, but Dean didn’t believe that for a minute. Cas was no better at dealing with his emotions than he was, so he was pretty sure that wouldn’t have been as easy as Cas was implying. “Yeah, I could have, but honestly, I doubt you could have answered. Hell, I’m not even sure of the question.”

Cas made a grunting sound that was pure annoyance and turned his gaze back away from Dean. Apparently, he wasn’t planning to meet him halfway.

“Look, Cas, this isn’t easy for either of us. I get that.” He knew what he wanted to say, but it was hard getting the words out. “Ok, here it is. I left because I wanted to give you space to decide what you wanted. I felt as if we’d gotten closer over the past year, but then you seemed to pull away.”

“Dean!” Cas gaped at him. “I was losing my grace.”

“I know,” Dean assured him. “And I wanted to be there for you, but I didn’t want to take advantage of you, either.”

“So, you don’t trust me to know my own mind?”

“After what you just went through? No, I don’t. At least I didn’t. Ugh,” he groaned. “None of this is coming out right.”

“Then just say what you mean,” Cas snapped.

“Fine,” he answered, his frustration building as well. “I like being near you, being close with you. I liked it when you sat near me and slept next to me at night. I want to work jobs with you. I liked how it felt when I kissed you, but hell if I know what any of that means because I’m not into guys. I just want you.”

Cas wasn’t saying anything, and that really wasn’t helping Dean feel good about his little outburst. He wasn’t sure if he had just made things worse, and he was about to apologize and slink off to some private corner when Cas reached over and laid his hand on top of his.

“I like being close to you as well.”

And Cas making that admission in his quiet, reserved voice just slammed into him. He tugged on his hand, pulling Cas close, positioning him so that his back was pressed up against his chest. He wrapped his arms around him, burrowing his face into his neck. Cas relaxed against him, and Dean was content to stay that way all night.

He pulled back slightly when another coughing fit took hold of Cas. He kept one arm around his waist and rubbed soothing circles on his back. Cas sounded so much worse than he had this morning, and he knew that something had to give, although, he still wasn’t sure that Cas would welcome his concern.

“Better?” he asked once Cas was breathing easier.

Cas nodded and leaned back, pushing himself back up against Dean. “I hate being sick,” he muttered.

“I know, but you’ve got to start taking it easy.”

“Dean.”

“No, I get it, and I’m not trying to nag you, but seriously Cas, if you don’t take care of yourself, this is only going to get worse.”

“What would you have me do?”

“Well, you could start by not going out and chopping wood in freezing weather.”

“And what exactly am I supposed to do when you and Sam are on the road?”

“How about be well enough to go with us?” Dean suggested. “Whatever it is we do, it was never my intention to do it without you.”

Cas didn’t answer, but he didn’t pull away either. They rested together in silence for a few minutes before Cas finally spoke. “I didn’t think you’d stay here.”

“What?” Dean was pretty sure he’d heard him correctly, but he was afraid of what it meant.

“I didn’t think you would want to be off the road. When I told Bert yes, I didn’t think you would want to do this.”

“You trying to ditch me, Cas?” He meant it as a joke, but it fell flat and hung heavy in the air between them.

“I didn’t want to weigh you down. You’d already spent the past year caring for me. I don’t want to be an obligation.”

“You’re not,” he promised, pulling Cas a little closer to him. “Do you like it here?”

“Heaven is the only home I’ve ever known. This place, it gave me a chance to try to build a new home.”

Even though Dean could understand why he felt that way, the words still stung. “You have a home with us.”

“There was a part of me that felt as if I needed to do this on my own, to be whole before I could be with you.”

“Just a part?” Dean questioned.

“Yes, the other part wanted the security and comfort of your presence.”

“And that’s what I want,” Dean assured him.

“You should know that there was this woman that I met several weeks ago. She made advances. I wanted to…I didn’t want to be alone.”

Cas was wrong. Dean didn’t want to know any of this. Sure, it made perfect sense that Cas would have these feelings, and Dean wasn’t sure what they were to each other that would entitle him to even feel the slightest bit jealous. Hadn’t he tried the same thing, with less than successful results, but still, he’d tried.

“It’s ok,” he lied.

“I didn’t do anything. I wanted to, but physically, I couldn’t.”

It took Dean a moment before he realized what Cas was telling him. “Oh. Not at all?”

“I understand if you feel….”

“Whoa, slow down,” Dean said, cutting off whatever Cas had been about to say. “We’re ok. We’ll get you checked out if it’s a medical problem, but you and me? We’re good.”

“Dean.”

“No, Cas. I want this, whatever it is. No amount of talking is going to change how I feel.”

“But intimacy is important in relationships, is it not? That’s what you meant, that you want to be in a relationship with me?”

“Yeah, that’s what I meant,” Dean told him, his hand tracing light patterns over Cas’ stomach. “And there are many ways to be intimate. You pulled me out of Hell. I would say this is the most intimate relationship I’ve ever been in. Give yourself time. We’ll see what happens, and we’ll figure it out together.”

“I once said all roads lead to the same destination. I could not have imagined that I would fall from grace and live out my life as a human. Even during the worst of our battles, I was more certain of death.”

“I honestly never thought I would be alive at this point in my life. I know it’s not ideal to go from being a powerful celestial being to a human with a chest cold, but having you here with me is more than I had ever expected.”

Cas shifted around a bit until his head was leaning against Dean’s shoulder. He could see that he was getting tired, but Dean had one more question that he needed to ask.

“Do you regret it?”

“I have done many things for which I have numerous regrets, but I consider it a miracle and a blessing that after all my transgressions, I am allowed to be here with you,” Cas answered easily, without hesitation.

It wasn’t a storybook ending. There were still adjustments to be made and monsters to hunt. Odds were that they would be facing down a monstrous big bad before the end of the month. And Dean knew that he and Cas would have their own challenges, both individually and together, but for the first time, Dean felt hopeful.

**Author's Note:**

> Apologies for any typos that I may have missed.


End file.
